Dear Diary,i went to church!

Realised that i haven't written in my diary for ages.Diary,not this sodding blog.And talking abt sodding (i picked it up from Charlie *wink) i think i really need to keep some of my daily use of rather foul expressions..even if i go church.Ok,i'll try reeeeal hard to kick em but it's hard! and um.i like them!

For eg:
-Damn.Alternatives include super,really which will sound boring after a while.Word used v freq
-bloody.Same use as tt of above but hardly spoken except when a war of "freakin n bloody" starts.A v fun,highly energetic game.Moronic too.
-Freakin.C'mon man.Tt's not exactly rude rit?
-Asshole.Fav word w Jan in pri sch.And when we see each other arnd,it'll be like we punch each other and go:hey asshole!It carried on in jc.Tt word has it's roots deep man!
can't think of more..just gd tt my vocab hadn't progressed to the f stage.Now.Tt's rude.

Anyway..i'm gg church! As in regularly! Wasn't really scared of gg Heen's church today.. i mean i would have last time..but after As i've seen a lot more..i was just afraid i'd end up looking stupid not knowing much of anything.9 yrs of bible knowledge belong to the section way back in the brain.Need some diggin to do.I was late! I hate myself for tt! But oh well. Pt the finger at the bus! It came crawling! Hate to be late.And the hymns were in Chinese. I've been v out of touch w chinese for 2 yrs..not gd.As in singing it..i have to get one of those chi-eng bible.If not the pastor says some verse in chi and i dun understand. Verses r kinda cheem..and i wanna learn stuff in church.Not gg for the sake of gg tt kinda stuff.. gg church is really my personal decision.It's not like i'm forced to...cos my parents don't go.. yup just wanna know more abt God.

Really happy that the youth group is so nice and friendly!! At first felt kinda shy..like u know everyone knows everyone for years and well..i'm..new.It's alright,it's always like this from the start=) Watched this super sad movie abt this woman who got cancer..a bitta love story but it's a catholic/christian kinda show.Nvrtheless,i bet anyone who watches it will CRY.Teared quite a few times myself.Lucky wasn't e only one.And hey! surprised myself by rem names so fast.Guess it's cos i got chidded in the office when i couldn't rem like 100+ names.*roll eyes! And Heen's sisters really look a lot alike! i mean all 3 of them! Such nice souls too=) And the rest of them are really nice..hope to get to know em better as time goes by.Ended up having a long lunch with them,they're quite easy to talk to.Got to catch up a bit w Heen too..though i still haven't said lotta stuff! haha..Went to visit my sec sch maths tuition teacher..he was surprised to see moi! And aiya shucks la.Should have asked him for a job.I could have worked there tending the counter like collect sch fees,ans the phone, teach p1 and p2 kids.SO CUTE! and interactive.Not like this monotonous stamping and chopping..ugh.

And um,talked to some frens these few days..and yea.Sometimes u really have to let go when you've tried so hard alr.You can't always always be the one making an effort.For whatever it is,you always need two hands to clap.And for whatever tt happens,just know tt i'll always be here.Even if time has weathered changes in us.It's just hard to let go sometimes,but you'll have to learn.